Normal pyjamas are boring. Be the monster.
A big mouth monster onesie in thick, fluffy fleece. Six colours. One terrible decision you won't regret.
Get your monster on · €54,95
Warning: may cause uncontrollable monster behaviour. Certified couch goblin. Six colours of chaos. Thick, fluffy coral fleece. Buy 2, save 10%. Buy 3, save 15%
Anatomy of a Blorp
Four parts. Zero dignity. Maximum cosy.
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The googly eyes
Two big eyes on the hood that look in slightly different directions. Like you on a Monday.
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The pout
A giant pink mouth that does the talking, so you don't have to.
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The pocket buddy
A mini monster pocket for your phone, snacks or the remote you'll never give back.
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The fluff
Thick coral fleece from hood to toes. Basically a blanket that learned to walk.
Pick your monster
Same fluff, six personalities. Choose wisely, or get two and let them argue.
Main character energy. Will narrate your life whether you asked or not.
Adopt Gary
Lives on the couch. Pays no rent. Very fluffy about it.
Adopt Steve
Chill to the bone. Cold hands, warm fleece.
Adopt Fran
Loud. Proud. Has opinions about your snacks.
Adopt Ron
Mysterious. Brooding. Secretly very cuddly.
Adopt Mo
Soft, sweet and absolutely not to be trusted near hot chocolate.
Adopt Mel
The gift that breaks the group chat.
Socks are forgettable. A fluffy monster with a giant pout is not. Get one for them, one for you, and match like the menaces you are.
Discounts apply automatically at checkout. No codes, no countdown timers, no nonsense.
Why you need a monster onesie
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Your couch deserves a roommate.
One that matches its energy and never steals the blanket. Because it is the blanket.
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It's a blanket with legs.
Walk to the fridge without losing a single degree of cosy.
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Matching with your partner, but make it weird.
Couple goals, monster edition. Pick two colours or go full twin.
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Instant group chat content.
One photo in a Blorp beats a hundred selfies. Science, probably.
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Normal pyjamas had their chance.
They were fine. Fine is boring.
Reviews? We literally just hatched.
No fake stars, no made-up quotes. When real Blorps start roaming the earth, their reviews land right here.
Stuff people ask
Can't find your answer? Message us and a real human (not a monster) will reply.
What size should I get?
Go by your height: S 150–155 cm, M 155–165 cm, L 165–175 cm, XL 175–185 cm. It's a loose, roomy fit, so if you're between two sizes, take the bigger one.
What is it made of?
Thick, fluffy polyester coral fleece. Soft, warm and very huggable.
Can I wash it?
Yes. Wash cold on a gentle cycle and skip the tumble dryer so your Blorp stays fluffy. Always follow the care label.
Is it one size fits all?
Nope. It comes in S, M, L and XL, all unisex.
How do the multi-buy discounts work?
Add 2 onesies to your cart and you save 10%. Add 3 or more and you save 15%. The discount is applied automatically at checkout. Mix colours and sizes however you like.
Can I return it?
Yes. Within the EU you can cancel your order within 14 days of receiving it. Send us a message through the contact page and we'll walk you through it.